Switch is a book unlike any other, it has something for everyone. Will it push you out of your comfort zone? Most certainly. Are parts of it shocking and risqué? Of course! But will it also take you on an eloquent and meaningful journey of self-discovery, honesty, and love? Absolutely.
In her memoir, Dr. Sandra LaMorgese (and her dominatrix alter-ego) take readers on a wild ride through a story that begins with struggle and defeat but ultimately transforms into a tale of fulfilment, success, and happiness—all because of a year spent working in one of the most famous BDSM dungeons in New York City at 55 years old after losing everything
Her on-the-job stories will make your jaw drop, and her stream-of-consciousness descriptions of her first days down in the dungeon will have you laughing out loud. Most importantly, though, in Switch, you will meet a person who faced challenges just like yours—dreams that looked unattainable, a love life that felt unfulfilling, and a future that seemed full of uncertainty. You will listen in on every epiphany during the difficult times of transition, and you will witness the beautiful metamorphosis that brought her to a place of true success, love, and peace.
Through Sandra’s vulnerability, bravery, and unfailing sense of humour, you just might find the same courage that she did—the courage to live authentically and to finally create the life of your dreams.
In 2011, her life felt like a disaster. She was a holistic practitioner who lost her award-winning wellness practice in the wake of the Great Recession. She was 55, with no prospects, no financial savings, no family members who would help, and friends who seemed to vanish into thin air. She found herself on her own with no hope in sight. On the worst days, she would feel overwhelmed by feelings of worthlessness and despair, and even contemplated suicide. But, from somewhere in this financial and emotional bankruptcy, she could always hear a small, persistent voice that kept saying, “I am resourceful.” I repeated those words, even when hope seemed impossibly far away.
Then one day, out of the blue, came the idea to become a professional dominatrix. At first, the idea was nothing more than an off-hand joke between her and a friend—one of those “Well, you could always become a circus clown/bounty hunter [insert equally ridiculous career option here]” kind of comments. Slowly, though, the idea took root in her mind.
At the time, she was working to earn my PhD in Metaphysical Science, studying female sexual empowerment and researching the transmutation of sexual energy. As a student of empowerment and sexuality, Sandra knew that becoming a dominatrix would truly teach me to “walk the walk” of authentic, non-judgmental sexuality, but no matter how hard she tried to talk myself into it, there was nothing in her reality telling me that it was possible. After all, who would hire a 55-year-old woman with no experience whatsoever as a dominatrix? She also struggled with many negative social influences that cast aside expressive sexuality and especially BDSM as wrong and taboo.
At the same time, though, I suspected that the experience could empower me as a woman. Deep down, I somehow understood that it would set me free from my own judgmental perceptions of how women should behave and follow the “rules.” Sandra also hoped it might get me back on my feet financially.
After weeks of using my most impressive powers of persuasion, she finally convinced a New York City BDSM dungeon to grant her an in-person interview. She started my dominatrix training three days later, and just like that, the scariest thing she ever did led Sandra into the most empowering experience of my life.
The dungeon was an extreme learning environment, to be sure, but during my time there Sandra learned to truly accept other people with an open mind and a compassionate heart. By practicing BDSM, she come to understand and celebrate the fact that people are different and have very different desires, sexualities, hopes, dreams, loves, purposes, ambitions, and styles. In her time at the dungeon working as a professional dominatrix, she met some of the most amazing, confident women she’d ever known. I will be inspired by those women and experiences for my entire life.
Four years have now passed since those dark months of hopelessness, bankruptcy, and loss.
Since then, Sandra has devoted my life entirely to encouraging others to embrace authentic living and sexuality. To do this, she lead workshops and seminars about the important health connections between sexuality and the mind, body, and spirit, the author of a memoir, Switch: Time for a Change, that shares her hero’s journey from holistic practitioner to professional dominatrix, and recently, she became the host of my own YouTube podcast show ad receive 10’s of thousands of views.
Sandra is a featured international Huffington Post blogger, in addition to being a writer for Filthy Gorgeous Media and Thought Catalog. She has been featured as an expert on The Howard Stern Show, Dr.Oz, New 12 To Your Health, Artrepreneur, Medical Daily, Forbes, FORTUNE Magazine, Sex City Radio, Playboy Radio, Business News Daily, Thrillist NYC, Alternet, Girl Boner Podcast, Time Out New York, New Jersey Life Magazine, POSE Magazine,The LYFE Magazine.
By sharing her story, she hopes to help others who are struggling to express their true selves. Becoming a professional dominatrix is not the answer for everyone. Instead, one person’s dream life may involve going back to college, opening a new business, colouring their hair green, or taking yoga for the first time. Maybe your answer is to let go of shame, guilt, anger, and resentment about who you are and what you desire to become. I hope that, after hearing Sandra’s story, you will think, If Sandy can overcome her fears and learn to hope again—all within the walls of a BDSM Dungeon— then maybe I, too, can learn to trust and go for the life of my dreams.
To Pre-order “Switch” from Amazon Online, click here